Love is such an interesting thing. No, I am not in love, nor have I ever been. I have always been not as happy because I thought I didn’t have someone who loved me for me (not including my family). I was laying on the couch watching some tv, and then this one scene came on where the girl was feeling bad about herself because she didn’t have a boyfriend lover person in her life. And the lady with her said, “you are surrounded by love. You have your family, friends and pets who would drop whatever they are doing to help you. That is love. Having a boyfriend is not the only love in your life.” (not quoted exactly). It really got me thinking. Here I was for MONTHS, maybe even years, down on myself because I’ve never had a boyfriend which I have mostly contributed to being heavier and more of an introvert. But you know what, I am surrounded by love. Some people don’t have half of the love that I have in my life. They don’t judge me because I’m fat or because I stay home a lot. They love me for me; a fun loving, loyal, kind person who would do anything in my power for them. I am blessed for the amount of love in my life. I don’t need some guy to tell me I’m beautiful to feel loved.
I just have to remember all of that up there.
This is known as hell week for me. It is the week before I get to finally go home for spring break (I fly out the 15th), the week I have to study my ass off for finals next week, the week I have to write a million papers, the week I have to try to sleep enough and not be a zombie, and most of all, the week that I am going to work out the most.
Stress on top of stress on top of stress.
Sunday and yesterday I worked out and burned about 600 calories each time. There’s 1,200 calories GONE!!! I ate like poop yesterday (not really poop, i’m not that gross). But today is a new day. The food after dinner always gets to me. I work out and then eat an apple but then after that, I get so hungry and then I just eat a granola bar or a small bowl of granola with milk. I need to stop doing that. After I eat my apple, I’m done for the day. No more eating.
The workouts have been good though. I normally HATE working out, but if I’m going to lose any weight, I need to actually work out. I usually go on the elliptical for about 45 minutes to an hour depending if I want to do weights. Sunday=no weights, yesterday=arms. Man, I’m sore. I love feeling sore though. It means I did some thing right!!
Don’t lose sight of your end goal, even when the going gets rough. You CAN DO THIS.
Happy Leap Day!
My suite mate told me yesterday that everyone should leap today in honor of the leap day. It was funny, last night, right a midnight, we both leaped down the hallways and got people to join us. We laughed and leaped for a good 5 minutes. I woke up this morning and the outsides of my thighs were sore hahaha. After 5 minutes!! I definitely need to get in shape.
I feel extremely motivated today. I have been choosing foods that are good for my body and providing me with energy. I worked out monday and plan to tonight after I finish my homework.
I have been trying this new thing were I get all my homework done before 9pm so after that I can either 1) workout 2)and/or shower 3) catch up on pleasure reading 4) catch up on tv shows. It’s going really well and I think I would like to make a habit of it. It feels healthy in a way.